Posted by: Mad Ness Monster | 07/01/2009

“Jetsons:the Movie!” review

(5/11/09)

Now there’s one big reason why I wanted to pick on this movie, but I’ll get to it in a few paragraphs.
Other than a few small things this movie is surprisingly good. I usually don’t like Hannah Barbera, but they stepped up their game here and actually spent money on the animation. They also came up with a pretty good story too, one that’s actually (scarily) even more relevant today. Big corporation Spacely Space Sprockets is paying dearly for their irresponsibility and is rapidly losing employees and money. The whole plot involves the Jetsons moving to the new Spacely plant to find out what went wrong.
It’s almost obligatory to note, when discussing “The Jetsons”, that for something set in the future, it hasn’t aged well. The thing I noticed most here wasn’t the outdated technology (though the fact that *nobody* foresaw a world with cell phones remains hilarious.) It’s the fact that the women in the future apparently have nothing better to do in their lives but go shopping. And occasionally they wine and angst about men. And to that I can only say, 😡
The subject of angsting over men brings us to the one thing in this movie I wanted to rent it for: the stunt casting of Tiffany as the voice of Judy Jetson. You are going to hear a lot of vocal angst from Tiffany in this movie, not to mention a lot of her failing utterly at being a voice actor. She’s especially noticeable because the rest of the cast is made up almost entirely of the original “Jetsons” voice actors and actresses, as well as other professional voice actors.
A lot of people put the blame squarely on “Aladdin” or “The Lion King” when they complain about the recent trends in animated film casting (“OMG, Will Smith is a fish and he quotes old movie lines WTF ROFLcopters”).   I think they’re forgetting this movie. I’m not kidding; the fact that Tiffany was in the movie was the *only* selling point in the trailer (see here).
This film -by one of those awful coincidences that the universe seems to run on- is also the last time we ever heard from George O’Hanlon and Mel Blanc. <:/

The Best Parts:
5 seconds in – Oh, I love the Universal Studios 75’th anniversary logo!
2 minutes in – Ooh, shiny CGI!
7 minutes in – My high school years are essentially defined by Rick Dees’ Weekly Top 40. And while I was very sad to find that it was no longer being broadcast locally (stupid Ryan Seacrest), that’s not exactly what I imagined Rick looked like. That’s the magic of animation!
8 minutes in – THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE FLYING CARS!
14 minutes in – LOL, 4:20.
16 minutes in – Hey, she’s like Courtney Cox!
Also, “Ja-Ja-Judy”.
19 minutes in – Release the Late ’80’s Pop!
20 minutes in – Judy, you met the guy once.
24 minutes in – How? Did you build them?
25 minutes in – In the future, Fergi will look… different.
30 minutes in – I finally found a movie where there is an Obligatory “Hey, why don’t we try to write one of them there ‘Hip Hopping Wrapped Music’ songs the kids like nowadays?” Song!
33 minutes in – Oh my God, Judy! You met the guy ONCE! You talked to him for THREE LINES OF DIALOGUE! GET OVER IT!!!
37 minutes in – And all the little kids in the audience go, “Ha ha ha, he said ‘Pee Day!'”
39 minutes in – But they still have a million sprockets, they just didn’t count them!
42 minutes in – Seems to me all they need to do is set out some Ewok traps.
Or maybe look for an asteroid that does not have life on it. Cause I’m pretty sure there are a lot of those.
45 minutes in – “Awwww-ah-ah-ahhh, bitter drink!”
46 minutes in – If anyone tries to tell you the 80’s were not trippy, show them this scene. Not coincidentally, it’s the best part of the movie.
47 minutes in – 42
48 minutes in – Your “boyfriend” that you knew – and I cannot emphasize this enough – for ONE WHOLE MINUTE!!!
50 minutes in – I guess she is going to miss you like a child misses their blankie.
52 minutes in – Um… I don’t want to think about that quandary too hard.
56 minutes in – Yes indeed Squee! *^_^*
59 minutes in – “Yeah, it’s a good thing they’re cute! Otherwise, we probably wouldn’t give a sh*t!”
1 hour, 3 minutes in – This woman is being proactive! She can’t be Jane!
1 hour, 4 minutes in – Form an equivalent to the Pachamama Alliance in space? Or would that make too much sense?
1 hour, 7 minutes in – “I suddenly have principles and I am not going to compromise them!”
1 hour, 10 minutes in – Oh, by the way, this reminds me a little of a “Star Trek T.N.G.” episode. And a “T.O.S.” episode.
1 hour, 12 minutes in – An hour ago you HATED having to move here!
1 hour, 14 minutes in – “Mario! Mario! Mario!!!”
1 hour, 15 minutes in – “Hey, why don’t we try to put TWO of those Hippity Hops the kids like nowadays in the movie?”

Classic Lines of Dialogue:
“I just found out Doris told Susie and Susie told Mary and Mary told Francie and Francie told me Helen took my date with Cosmo! And now my heart is totally broken! I’ll never be happy again! Never! Never!!!” – a sample of Judy’s major contributions to the story
“Hey Judy, wanna come with me to the big shopping mall tomorrow?” – a sample of Jane’s major contributions to the story, at least until she grows a pair (of ovaries) later on

~*~ Poetry Corner ~*~
“Maybe love!!! / Maybe NOT!!!” – Steve McClintock. Yes, Steve “The Edge of a Dream” from “Space Mutiny” McClintock.

Things I Learned from this Movie/Book/Whatever:
* – Just because someone is a singer, does not mean they will not be a phenomenally terrible voice actor.
* – Nobody foresaw cell phones.
* – Bland adult contemporary music will never go away.
* – Late 80’s style pop music will finally be played again – in the future.
* – There will be no safety code compliance in the future.
* – In the future, women will have nothing to do but go shopping and angst about men. And again, all I can say is, 😡

Things That Can Save Any Movie:
Cool Creatures?
They’re cute but they’re all kind of familiar…
Good Soundtrack? It’s late ’80’s pop music. If you have nostalgia for that type of music that hardly ever gets played anymore, then yes. Otherwise…
Hot Guys? Blue-skinned Bishonen aliens if that’s your thing.
Pretty Scenery? Once again, Hannah-Barbera stepped up their game here.
Nifty Animation/Special Effects/Illustrations? Especially in the “You and Me” bit.

Drinking Game Potential? Drink when you want to slap Judy.

Head Movie Potential? Repeat: the “You and Me” sequence.

Rating: Jordan rating (3)
Jordan in a flying car that, for whatever reason, has everything *but* a cell phone.
Credits
A Hannah-Barbera Film released by Universal Studios in 1990. Written by Dennis Marks and directed by Iwao Takamoto. Shiny late-80’s CGI by deGraf/Wahrman inc. and Kroyer Films inc. Trippy “You and Me” sequence by Kurtz and Friends.
Cast
Mel Blanc, George O’Hanlon, Don Messick, Russi Taylor, Frank Welker, Brian Cummings, Penny Singleton, Brad Garrett, Rick Dees, and Steve McClintock. Oh, and Tiffany.
Related Links
IMDB page

The Funtastic World of Hanna-Barbera – Well, as far as cartoon crossovers go, this ain’t “Kingdom Hearts” – but it’s also a hell of a lot more fun than the “Shrek” ride.  Note the beginning, where Bill H. and Joe B. list the upcoming films.
The Pachamama Alliance – These people are my gorram heroes.
Onion AV Club interview with Billy West – Heroic in a different way.  The well-loved voice-actor rips into the sad fact that so many animated films nowadays are more like a game of “guess the celebrity voice!”
“Outside the House!” – And another little anti-stunt-voice-casting slice of awesome.  (I have to admit, I would watch the hell out of a movie with William Shatner playing a flower pot.)

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