Posted by: Mad Ness Monster | 06/27/2009

“UHF” review

(3/30/04)

Likely as not, this is exactly what you’d expect a “Weird Al” movie to be like.

There are parodies, silly gags, and general weirdness throughout. Not all of them work, but there is always a new pun or song just around the corner. If you have an obsession with incredibly strange movies, you are required to watch this one at least once in your life. Otherwise, careful review of the following highlights will determine whether this movie is for you.

The Best Parts:
1 minute in – “It’s just a flesh wound!”
6 minutes in – “Hi. I’m in Delaware.”
9 minutes in – Ugh.
14 minutes in – Philo!
17 minutes in – NOOOO!!! JAMIE!!!!!
19 minutes in – Stanley!
24 minutes in – Ooh, that’s evil.
25 minutes in – Emo!!! Truly the strangest creature in a movie full of strange creatures.
29 minutes in – SCARY CLOWN ALERT!!!
30 minutes in – Aww, that’s cute.
38 minutes in – Hooray! Somebody finally “gets” Wile E. Coyote!
41 minutes in – “Life is like a mop.”
43 minutes in – “Wheel of Fish!!!”
45 minutes in – “Secrets of the Universe!”
46 minutes in – ANIMAL CRUELTY GALORE!!!
50 minutes in – Holy God…
51 minutes in – Awww, that’s so sweet!
53 minutes in – Holy God… Second movement.
57 minutes in – Yeek!
1 hour, 2 minutes in – Furniture-philia? Wait, I’ve read about some pretty twisted stuff here in the Internet; why am I surprised?
1 hour, 7 minutes in – Stanley the rocket scientist.
1 hour, 8 minutes in – Chug! Chug! Chug!!!
1 hour, 12 minutes in – Aww, it’s just like the final act of “Reloaded”! “My mop!!!”
1 hour, 15 minutes in – That beats Kahn’s plastic chest all to hell.
1 hour, 17 minutes in – Things go boom!
1 hour, 20 minutes in – What the hell?
1 hour, 22 minutes in – Hoo-hoo! Nice!
1 hour, 29 minutes in – Hey, he’s like Poochie! (pause) And Large Marge!

Classic Lines of Dialogue:
“What can I say? I’m a miserable, hopeless lump of slime!… I want you to take this crowbar and just BASH MY HEAD IN!!!” – George
“Ooh! Would you look at that? Just call me Mr. Butterfingers.” – Emo (after losing a thumb to a table saw)
“George, I was wonderin’, if you were travelin’ through outer space, an’ you were goin’ the speed of light, an’ ye started screamin’ ‘AAAAAAAAAHHH’, would yer brain explode?” – Stanley
“Boy oh boy, are we gonna have fun today. We’re gonna have SO much fun, we’re all gonna forget about how miserable we are, and how much life SUCKS! And how we’re all gonna grow old an’ die!” – George
“Not too many people know this, but the turtle is nature’s suction cup!” – Raul

Things I Learned from this Movie/Book/Whatever:
* – Once again, hackers can do anything. They are like magic!
* – Life is tough all over if you’ve got a good imagination and don’t know what to do with it. (Okay, I knew that already, but it bears repeating.)
* – Most people have blankets or teddy bears. A select few people have mops.
* – Ant Farm ≠ Etch-a-Sketch.
* – “There comes a time in every mans’ life when he has to look the potato of injustice in the eye!” – Stanley

Things That Can Save Any Movie:
Cool Creatures?
If Weird Al and his friends count…
Good Soundtrack? Song parodies!
Hot Guys? Uh… no.
Pretty Scenery? Uh… no.
Nifty Animation/Special Effects/Illustrations? Hooray for trippy 80’s CGI and stop-motion!.

Drinking Game Potential? Drink when they do a parody of something.

Head Movie Potential? Ayuh.

Rating: Donnie rating (4)
Hey, I’m a stickler for comedies where a lot of crazy stuff happens. Al, meet Donnie.
Credits
An Orion Pictures film released in 1989 by MGM. Written by Al Yankovic and directed by Jay Levy.
Cast
“Weird Al” Yankovic, Mike (Pre-“Seinfeld”, Pre-Meltdown) Richards, Victoria Jackson, Fran Dresher, Gedde Watanabe, Billy Barty, and Emo Phillips.
Related Links
IMDB page
Mutant Reviewers from Hell review

Advertisements

Categories

%d bloggers like this: